Phase Two, Day Two

That's right folks, I made it! Two whole weeks of deprivation. I am a little shocked myself. 2nd week was a tad easier than the first week from a routine stand point, but I think the cravings were actually worse. I think the idea of being closer to being able to eat other food again, made me want those food so much more. Sunday night I was sitting there impatiently and decided I would start to reintroduce my first food that night. Hey! I deserved a little something something for sticking it out! So I poured myself a nice cold glass of 2% milk and gulped it down. It was delicious. But anything new compared to what I've been eating would be delicious at this point. I didn't experience any issues. Last night, I had the same and again so far so good. I'm hoping my third night with La Leche will be a success. Then you are supposed to go back into detox for 3 days and try the next food. These are their recommendations for testers...

 Soy: Organic tofu, edamame, home-made soy milk
 Corn: Organic fresh corn, polenta, grits
 Yeast: Vinegars (balsamic, white), pickles, olives canned in vinegar, other fermented foods
 Eggs: Organic eggs, cooked in any manner (scrambled plain, poached, hard-boiled, etc.)
 Dairy: Milk, cheese, butter or yogurts
 Gluten: Whole wheat pasta, shredded wheat cereal, whole wheat tortilla, bulgur wheat, rye or spelt.

I don't see the reintroduction phase going as planned for me, but I will do my best. An in the spirit of being honest, I do have a confession to make. I cheated. This morning I broke down, walked over to the cafeteria at work and bought a sausage and cheese croissant. I took 3 bites and threw it out. It's not that it tasted bad, I just literally started to feel guilty about giving in now, after ALL that hard work. So I picked up my regular scheduled breakfast, a banana, ate it and moved on. The good news is, no upset stomach, so far, but I did only have 3 bites, big bites, but just 3 none the less.

It's so funny, of all things to cave on, I didn't think it would be that! I think my momentary slip was due to my lack of energy. I'm still extremely fatigued. I think I need carbs! It may be time to consult with a nutritionist some time in the near future. I honestly don't know if eating healthy is worth it if I have to deal with feeling THIS tired all the time. I don't even have the energy to go walking right now. Eat and sleep is all I do. :(

So, I am hoping I can power through this lull and keep progressing. I will check back in, in a few days!

Phase One, Day Eleven

Soooooo verrrrrry tired. Like, soooooooooooooooooooooo very tired. I've been sleeping more than find, in fact all I want to do is sleep. But I have slowly but surely lost all the pep in my step during the daytime. I am grouchy, testy, moody and did I mention sleepy already????  So what are the pros you may be asking???

Well, I'm not sure I'm in the right frame of mind to talk to you about pros, but I will try to anyway. They go a little something like this...

1. The Scale! Can you believe I would EVER put The Scale in a pro column? The numbers have slowly but surely been declining. Probably the pro that keeps me going.
2. Baggy clothes! Along with item number one above, all my clothes have been just a little less clingy, which is an amazing feeling. Enough said.
3. Tummy Issues are far and few between. This is HUGE! I do have a slight feeling that I can no longer have the almond milk. I've had a few instances where the glass of almond milk in the morning hasn't sat well and I think it's time to remove it. I didn't have it yesterday or today and again, I had some tummy issues this morning. So now I'm looking at the banana and almond butter. :( I will be devastated if it turns out I can't eat bananas because they have been saving grace. So has the almond butter, for that matter. I'm going to drop them for a couple days and try again and see what happens. For now, I have less than 24 hours to figure out what my breakfast is going to be now!!!!!!

Until my body decides to recoup from the yawns, I will probably start looking reading up on foods ( I can eat) that give you energy! Any suggestions?

Phase One, Day Seven

We're you expecting me to say I only made it through day two and caved!!!??? Maybe that I slipped and forgo I wasn't supposed to have something and decided to give in and just start all over another time!!??? Believe me, both of those scenarios crossed my mind as cop outs, but I am here to tell you the this ship has stayed it's course! 

I have survived through multiple dining out adventures, a birthday party with about 4 different kinds of cake and even a Father's Day brunch buffet fit for a king! I would have killed for a piece of cake today. Like yellow cake with chocolate icing or a double dose, chocolate cake and chocolate icing. Mmmmmmm. Sorry, I've been distracted. Alright, minus having to battle daily cravings popping up  at random, so far so good. I am eating a lot of chicken, have embraced quinoa and am officially having a love affair with bananas. They are my sweet tooth contender. I've said it before and I'll say it again banana ice cream is my savior, and I'm hoping I will one day be able to throw a little Nutella into that mix. Yumness! I can't seem to buy enough lemons and avocados and rice and veggies and the name of the game. Fruit is my snack and dessert for several meals!

Another item I am missing is drinking anything other than water. I miss my coffee and tea. I feel like I will find out that caffeine is one of my no no items and that makes me so sad. But water has taken over my life, so refreshing but very boring at the moment. Not to mention the multiple bathroom breaks make me feel like I'm 9 months pregnant. I've never been 9 months pregnant, but I'm just guessing.

As for how I'm feeling, I flip flop between have random spurts of energy and feeling like I could fall asleep anywhere at anytime. Again, bloating and fullness in my stomach is gone! I think some if that is the foods I am eating don't make my innards feel like they are being stretched to the max! Bowel movements have been regular and that's about all I will share on that. :) I didn't weigh myself when I started this cleanse and I hadn't weighed  myself prior to that in a while. From the last weigh in, several weeks ago and the latest weigh in there is a difference of about 13 lbs. I know that wasn't all in this week, but I bet a good 5 of it was! May e that's wishful thinking. But I weighed tonight and will weigh again next Sunday, so we'll have a more accurate number. 

Will update you guys soon. Until then I will leave you with my dinner tonight, which was baked chicken wings marinated in almond milk and then sprinkled with salt, pepper, garlic powder and a little paprika. I served them with rice and asparagus and it was delicious! The leftovers will make lunch for tomorrow, score!

Hope you had a great Father's Day!

Phase One, Day Two

Things got a little hectic this evening. A little panicky, if you will. But let me start from the beginning.

Breakfast consisted of the same as yesterday, banana with almond butter and a cup if unsweetened almond milk. Fulfilling enough, but starting to think my stomach doesn't care for the almond milk. I'll give it one more try tomorrow.

Lunch was leftovers from last night, the pork and quinoa. I chopped up the pork mixed it in the quinoa and added half an avocado. It was amazing, but it got the job done! I ended things with a bowl of strawberries and cantaloupe, yum!

For a snack I had a handful of rice chex mix. Apparently that wasn't enough because by the time I got home and started preparing dinner I started to get the shakes. I kept switching back and forth between feeling of utter starvation and wanting to puke. It was really weird. I finished cooking as fast as I could and scarfed it down when it was ready, two servings!!!!! Dinner was a ground beef patty seasoned with cumin, Brussels sprouts and rice. It was delicious, but then again I was starving!

I started to calm down a  little, but was still pretty shakey. And then, the craving hit! I needed something sweet or I was going to die! I immediately remembered the banana ice cream recipe I pinned on Pinterest and made a bee line for Target. I needed 4 bananas and a blender, STAT!

I ran back home, peeled and cut the bananas and threw them into the freezer, where they would sit and freeze for two hours. I decided to try and walk off the rest of my anxious jitters. I went for a 30 minute walk, came back and blended my frozen chopped up nanners into frozen perfection.

After all that, in spent! A hit shower and a chick flick is what's on the agenda. Day two was definitely not as easy as day one. The lack of caffeine is killing me and the sugar cravings are enough to make me want to jump off a bridge. Am I being too dramatic? Cause it doesn't feel like it.

Any suggestions on a healthy way to curb the cravings?

Until tomorrow,goodnight.

Phase One, Day One

It feels like day one of a ship wreck! The first part of the day was a blur. Work was so busy I didn't get a chance to really complain about the banana and almond butter I had for breakfast or the cup of unsweetened almond milk. I didn't even flinch when I went to Chuys and declined the chips, salsa AND creamy jalapeño! Can you believe that!!!! I had a grilled chicken salad with olive oil and lemon as my dressing. No, pigs aren't flying...but they should be! My snack was a combo bowl of carrot sticks and an apple. The day didn't really hit until I was on my way home. I would have killed for a slice of pizza or a cheeseburger. Better yet, I needed something sweet and was a little nervous whether or not I could hold out. But I did and we had grilled pork chops with quinoa and broccoli. And if that wasn't enough I ended the night with a grumpy 40 minute walk. At this point of the night the no caffeine, no sugar, no yummy had kicked in. I'm proud to sad I made it through day one. Vance said he'd do this elimination diet with me, and made it all of 5 hours before being face deep in ice cream!!! Some buddy system.

After the walk I went straight to the shower and have planted my butt in the bed. I think I deserve that. :) I'll let you know the days continue...

Process of Elimination

Tomorrow (hopefully) I start the Dr. Myers Elimination Diet. I hate that it's called a diet, but I'll make do. One of my best friends Mother in Law and Aunt are currently on the program and were sweet enough to pass along the ebook so I can follow. Her Aunt is Gluten Intolerant and allergic to corn! The diet pretty much is broken down into two phases, the elimination is phase 1. For 14 days there is no alcohol, caffeine, sugar, artificial sweeteners, no fast food, junk food, processed foods, no sweets, no wheat, flour, corn...basically the list of what I can eat is shorter than what I can. Those items are just the ones that hit closest to home. Phase 2 is reintroducing these foods one by one to see how your body reacts. At the end, you should know what foods are working for you and what foods are working against you. At least, that is the plan!

Yes, I am totally aware of how difficult this is going to be. I know my success is solely dependent on my ability to apply myself to this plan. And to STICK with it. But here's the thing, if I can't do this I get to continue with exactly how things are currently. Yes, I will be able to eat all the crap I want, but I will also be able to continue being overweight, unhealthy, tired, have stomach issues, be insecure and self conscious. OR, I can make a solid attempt to take control of my eating habits. What's the worst that can happen? I feel better? How terrible would that be? Maybe even lose a little weight? Man, that would just be horrible!

So over the next 14 days, I need instant reminders of what I am gaining from this to help me stay the course. A super list of pros that is so phenomenal, the option of not succeeding isn't even a possibility! I am going to work on this list tonight and post tomorrow. I have a feeling I will need  the reminder/ motivation tomorrow.

Thanks for lending the ear/ eye. Have any of you done the Elimination diet? Any advice?

It's Not THAT The Wind Is Blowing...

A co-worker of mine sent me an article about symptoms if Gluten intolerance. There was about 10 symptoms and I currently experience pretty much all if them. To be honest they are all regular symptoms and could be linked to anything, but the one that stood out was infertility. I don't talk much on this blog about our struggle with infertility, but we've been trying to get pregnant for almost two years now. All week I've been thinking about going gluten free for a couple of weeks to see how I feel. I know it's going to be extremely difficult. But I'm willing to try anything, right!? 

Tonight, after Vance's soccer game, we stopped off for a quick bite to eat. We shared a pizza and had a fried ravioli appetizer. All of which are jam packed with gluten. I started thinking, will I really be able to the this up? I mean, I want a family more than I want gluten, right! The thought alone made me queasy. I can't believe I am even questioning it. Even as I'm laying here typing this, I feel miserable having ate as much as I did and feel so bloated! Won't I feel better if I give this all up??? Not to mention I would almost force me to eat/prep at home, so we'd be saving money too. And how awesome would it be if we could get pregnant by simply changing my eating habits. It sounds like a win win to me, now I just wish I could follow through with it.

About this time is when I start looking at weight loss blogs and success stories and wonder why it can't be me? Why is this desire to be healthy such a huge hurdle? If working out and eating better will do nothing but help me, why am I so attached to my old habits? Because I'm lazy and because the effort is just too much. But us it worth feeling miserable, and tired and uncomfortable into own skin for the rest of my life? Do i want to spend the rest of my years wondering what living healthy would feel like?

Just a lot to think about. Anyone else gluten free or have tried gluten free to trial your intolerance?

Update

I have just thrown away the remaining sweet tea from lunch and grabbed a bottle water. I also donated the package of Reese's Peanut Butter BIG CUPS to my boss.

#progress

Cayman's Anyone?

You would think a trip to the Grand Cayman Islands in May would be enough of a motivator for me to stick to a freakin' goal! I mean, we're talking paradise here people and I seem to quote alright with being the BEACHED WHALE! I am excited about this trip for several reasons...

1. It's FREAKIN' vacation!
2. Vance went here with his family before we were engaged. When he came back, all he talked about was how he wished I was there so he could have proposed to me on the beautiful beach. Maybe he'll pop the question a second time, for old times sake!
3. I thought this trip would really be a motivator for me to kick things into gear.

I need to remember to give myself credit where credit is due. The truth is I am currently going to the gym for an hour Monday through Thursday. That is four times a week more than I have been going in the last 5 years or more. And I am proud of myself. BUT the harsh reality is that it's not enough.

I went in to the Dr on Monday, just a little routine visit. She asked me all the normal questions. When I told her about the exercise class, she was glad to hear it. Something about the relief in her eyes, made me a little depressed. But I told I was starting my 2nd month of four times a week workout and I really haven't lost any weight. I have noticed things fitting better, but I had actually GAINED a few pounds. She informed me this was totally normal. That I am gaining weight because I am swapping muscle for fat and fat weighs more...AWESOME and that exercise will really only help me to tone and maintain my current weight,  not necessarily help me lose any. Id I wanted to lose the weight, I would have to tackle my food issues. Let me tell you how UPLIFTING that visit was.

I know I am I am going to just sound like a giant tit bag, excuse the expression, but it just seems like SO much work! And I feel like I will NEVER be able to eat anything that tastes good again. And I just don't know how worth it, being skinny is.

WOW!!!! That actually just came out of my mouth! It's embarrassing, but true! And, I don't want to be skinny, but I want to be healthy and that means losing some lbs. I feel like I am having the never ending conversation with myself. I am just constantly waiting for something to click.

Yesterday I worked from home and went through a GIANT box a photos from high school and college. I was digging around some for some motivating photos. Shockingly enough, I found a TON. I don't remember liking my body back then either, but looking at those photos, I would KILL for that body now. This is quite possible one of the hardest journey's I have ever been on. I'm not sure how I will do this, but I know I HAVE TO. This year I turn 30, in July, and if I don't make this change now, it will be THAT MUCH harder to do the older and more set in my ways I get. I wish my actions were as dedicated as my words.

I wish my actions were as dedicated as my words.

I wish my actions were as dedicated as my words.

I wish my actions were as dedicated as my words.

I think I will continue to repeat this until they are...

How's Your Eating Going...

Yesterday, mid squat thrust my trainer comes over and asks, "So Stephanie, How's your eating going,". Uhhhhhhhhhhhh. Well the honest truth is my eating is going about as well as the squat thrusts, TERRIBLE and PAINFUL! I might have discussed this before, but I truly feel like I have some sort of an emotional tie to food. I've never been a binge eater, I don't think, and have never been bulimic, but I tend to eat what I'm feeling. After bad days I want to dive head first into chocolate and ice cream with a side of brownies and a pizza on top. I mean honestly, that sentence basically sums it up. I've never dieted because the thought of not being able to eat what it is I might crave just makes me all kinds of crazy. How sad is that?????  I feel like I have ZERO will power to put down the bad stuff and pick up the good. It's sort of depressing. That's why I decided to focus on exercising first. As much as I don't want to do it, I'd much rather continue to eat what I want and just suffer through 4 hours of sweat and tears a week. Again, terrible, TERRIBLE statement, but it's truth.

Before I sound like a complete lost cause and I realize it may be too late for that I'd like it noted that I have given up all fast food joints. Except for the occasional I slept late, didn't have time to make breakfast so I had to stop and grab something. And, I have been trying to drink more tea and less carbonated sodas. The best cure for this is the mini sodas. Plus, they are so cute! So it's not for lack of effort that my eating sucks...right?

You are probably wondering why I am telling you all of this. One, this is a little therapeutic and two, I want to try a cut a few more things from my plethora of food choices. I'd like to start cutting back on bread, insert audience OOOOooooooooh noise now, and on my sweets intake. For any of you out there who know me, this has got to be my GREATEST down fall...my obsession with dessert! Before I can even take my last bite of whatever meal I am having, I have already started to think about what I am getting for dessert. I mean seriously, there has got to be a disease for that, right!!!??!! I mean at the same moment I am writing this post, I have been talking to a lady who I am hiring to make a cake for my Mom's retirement party and I am so excited about eating this cake the party is like a MONTH AWAY! What is wrong with me. I'm digressing. So long story short, starting today I am going to try and NOT eat something sweet after EVERY meal, but try not to eat anything sweet at all. I don't know how many days it will last, I know Friday is my cousin's birthday and my Aunt has ordered her wedding cake flavor and I've been thinking about that ALL week too, so my chances aren't good.

So far today, the only sweet I've had was the sugar in my coffee. I got back from lunch and my devil of a co-worker had brought me back a chocolate chip cookie the size of my face. Not to mention the package of Reese's Peanut Butter Big Cups in my desk drawer. So this will be interesting to say the least. I will do my best to be honest and check in with you. And just so you know just HOW HARD this will be, I've already come up with a list of things I want to eat since I've decided not to eat them. It goes a little something like this... (all found via Pinterest)

Well Hello There...

Are introductions back in order? Posting has been like slowly peeling off a band aid, that is REALLY stuck on there. I've clicked the link to this blog several times with words just sitting on the tips of my fingertips and then...nothing. So I've hit the X box to close out and tired again a few days later. Same thing happened. I finally realized that my posting would be me having to fess up to being unaccountable, unmotivated and under achieving. But it is what it is. And how else do you over come a hurdle, other than crossing over it, learning from it and maybe doing better the next time. So, here's to me crossing the hurdle.

Since last we met I was slowly but surely on the decline. I had stopped attending the tabatas class I was taking and didn't re-enlist. Before I knew it holidays were creeping up and then in blink of an eye it was 2013!!! Where does the time go? I kept talking to Vance about signing back up for my class, but never did it. I started to look for a rec volleyball team I could join for SOME exercise, but quickly talked myself out of that as well. Then, about 2-3 weeks into January I got an email from the lady who ran the tabatas class. She was running a special for a 4 week session. It was heavily discounted, so without hesitation I registered and immediately started dreading the following Tuesday!

I took every mental and physical bone in my body to get to class. Being lazy is like a wet blanket. But I arrived, participated, hyperventilated, felt like dying, but more importantly, SURVIVED. I enrolled for Tues/Thur Tabatas for 4 weeks. And it took that full 4 weeks to get back into the groove. The thing I LOVE about this class is that it's all women, of ALL shapes and sizes and fitness levels. Everyone is very inviting and FUN and I feel VERY comfortable. We also very easily fall into the role of keeping tabs on each other. Making sure we all show up, which is nice. One of the ladies in my class mentions she also attends class on Mondays and Wednesdays. Those two days are strength training. She said there were only 3 ladies in that class total and that I should think about joining. When the 4 weeks was up I signed back up for my Tues/Thurs day and then added the Mon/Wed one! This is week 3 of the 4 day work out schedule. Besides a few overlaps between work and personal things during the week, I've been doing pretty good with my attendance. I actually find it easier to go 4 days in a row, rather than just two days. The momentum totally helps. Friday thru Sunday I try to at least get a walk or two in there, maybe do a little hiking with the family. But for now, I am focusing on making this 4 day workout routine a permanent task in my week.

Results??? Why yes, I think I've seen a few. To be clear, I have seen ZERO lbs shed. Like NONE what so ever. In fact, I think I have gained a few. But things are fitting better. Denim jackets that I bought a size smaller are starting to feel a little baggy and I am able to button it now! I feel like my gut hangs out just a little less than it used to. But the biggest result has been my energy level. Having said that, last week and this, I've had a little set back in the energy department, but for the most part it has definitely increased! I used to come home from class and feel completely defeated. Like, even eating took effort. So I would drag myself to the car from the studio, practically crawl to the front door, muster up the strength to lift and pour milk into my cereal bowl from the gallon jug and try to make the journey from the bowl to the spoon with minimal spillage. Next, I would bitch and moan through removing workout clothes and try to stand on wobbly legs through the worlds quickest/hottest shower known to man. I would suffer through putting on pj's and then basically tuck and roll into my side of the bed, where I would hunker down for the night, at a whopping 8:15 pm at night!!! Hahahahaha. Pathetic.

These days I come home still a little sore, but so pumped! We usually start dinner when I get home, eat at the table, like a civilized family and then pack my clothes for tomorrow's workout, maybe do a load of laundry. Might watch of few episodes of something good on TV and then call it a night after my shower. It's an amazing feeling.

I know that all sounds like roses and butterflies, but there are a few draw backs. I have done nothing, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to change my eating habits. :( One, I am weak and two, I just don't wanna. Well and I guess three, I feel like I need to tackle one hurdle at a time. So I'm choosing to focus on the exercise for right now. I'm guessing that's probably why I haven't seen any lbs fall off yet. I will say the more I work out and don't see the lbs fall off, the more compelled I am to start working on my food intake. So maybe shortly I will be starting that little adventure. Until then I am back...with vengeance and ready to give this thing another go.

What have you guys been up to for the past 7 months?

Cats Out of The Bag!

The absence of posts here is definitely related to the absence of my motivation and will power to do, well, anything at this point. The last couple of weeks have been tough on several fronts, so I am going to spit the basics off to bring us up to speed.

Last Monday, one of my best friends from high school had his first son! Went to visit him at the hospital and take him and his new family lunch.

Got food poisoning from said lunch and spent Monday night dying in the bathroom and Tuesday and Wednesday re-cooperating and losing about 5 lbs!

Broke down and joined a plus size boot camp, wasn't all that is was cracked up to be. Attended the Monday session, missed the Wednesday session due to death by Taco Deli and attended the make-up session on Saturday, which happened to be a different class. The class was Tabatas and it ruled and I've switched to that class on Tues/Thurs/Sat, SUPER EXCITED. This is my red face after getting my ass kicked.

So as of lately, I am trying to eat things like this...

and these yummy Kix to crave my appetite. Probably not the BEST choice, but a vast improvement from before.

I'll keep you posted. :)

A Week In The Life...

This blog has a cloud hanging over it. To lift the spirits around here, let's talk style! Here is a week in the life on my inner-pinner. This is what my wardrobe would look like if I could recreate my pinterest finds!

Monday

To shake the weekend mode off and get back into the swing of all things work related, I would adorn myself in a sweet and sophisticated number like below. The structured shirt tucked and belt look keeps me crisp, but that animal print skirt says I had a FUN weekend and the FUN ain't over yet!

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Tuesday

Tuesday puts me back in the swing of things and my black pants are screaming for a POP of color on top. I may be working like a dog, but there is LIFE in this little mama.

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Wednesday

Wednesday means it's almost over and to celebrate I WILL be meeting my girls for some hump day cocktails. To keep my high spirits in tact all day I'm sportin' an eye catching outfit. Peplum is HOT and who can take there eyes of that neon skirt!

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Thursday

Thursday puts me that much closer to FRIDAY! I am letting the lax of the weekend slowly slip into my mood and my wardrobe. A relaxed fit top and some cropped slacks fit the bill nicely.

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Friday

Oh it's FRIDAY! And the throwback college girl in me is ready to the throw the hair up in a messy bun, pull the jeans on and a cute top and chillax it all the way to 5 O'clock. So I do just that in a workable manner.

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Saturday

Hot date night with my main squeeze...enough said.

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Sunday

And Sunday commences with cute but minimal effort for whatever happens to come our way! A little Home Depot, maybe Bed Bath and Beyond...clearly we don't know if there will be enough time. ;)

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The LONG Road Ahead

I am going to refer back to my very first post and wonder WHY ON EARTH can't I be one of those weight loss bloggers who decides to change and sticks with it? What magic piece to this puzzle am I missing? I think it goes without saying that I did not stick to my goal of walking five times a week, for two weeks straight. My choices are I can beat myself up about it or, I can accept that it didn't happen this time, reflect on why it didn't happen and make changes accordingly to give another go, right?

I have noticed, especially these last two days, that I am VERY dependent on Vance to help me achieve this goal. I need to work on being more self reliant. He's been feeling a little off this week and opted out of walking on Tuesday and Wednesday and surprise, surprise...so did I. I couldn't just leave him on the couch all cute and cuddly!

Please excuse our dirty laundry!

I like when Vance goes for a couple reasons. One, I'm kinda partial to him, two he pushes me to walk longer and three, we seem to have some pretty good convo's on our little walks. We make all sorts of plans... money plans, budget plans, dinner plans, weekend plans, 2nd house plans, its a planners dream!

When I walk I tend to max out an an hour. On average, I'm good for a solid 45 minutes. When Vance comes with me, I'm guaranteed a hour and a half, it's brutal, but I do it and it feels somewhat miserable great after! Needless to say, he is a valued asset, but I need to start relying on my own assets, I have plenty, to accomplish my goals.

So it seems the long road ahead just keeps getting longer. :( I don't know how many washes I am going to give myself, as of right now, it seems like as many as it takes. So I will call this week a wash, reset the goal and  hope for better results next week.

What are you guys doing to stay on track???

I'm Here

Hello all! Just wanted to drop in and say I'm here. I've started about 4 or 5 posts and quickly deleted them for lack everything, basically. I have only walked once in the last 12 days, which is TERRIBLE. I had a birthday in between now and then, which sent my schedule into a whirl wind and haven't quite been able to get it back on course. But we went for a pretty lengthy walk last night and it left me missing it. So hoping the progress will continue through the week.

That's literally all I've got for now. I think I've found myself in a bit of a funk and desperately trying to make my way out of it.

Let me know how you guys are doing!!!!! I need some positive peeps right about now.

Keep on Rollin'

After my two hiatus last week, it was SUPER important that I quick jump back on the bandwagon, as to not lose any momentum. I spent the last hour of work on Monday, mentally preparing myself to get home, eat dinner and then WALK, walk, walk, walk, walk, walk. As I shut down my computer at about 10 til 6:00pm and headed out to the parking garage, I was confronted with this...

The storm was rolling in. Thunder, lightning, and sideways rain! Not quite sure how I didn't hear or see this while in my building, but it looked horrendous. I drove home as quickly as possible, but with most of the drivers going a whopping 30 mph, it took a little longer than usual. The trip from my car to inside my house left me dripping wet from head to toe. Which is only about 15 feet. And the lovely weather proceeded to hold up for the next several hours. End result, no walk. :( That made three days in a row and I was starting to get a little perturbed. So perturbed in fact, that I managed to not get to sleep until 3:52am on the dot. 

That left Tuesday a blurry mess. I surprisingly shot out of bed at 7:00am all bright eyed and bushy tailed and made it through lunch with no problems. But 30 minutes after I got back, I was ready for bed. For the remainder of the day I was did everything I could just to stay awake, it was sad and miserable. You can imagine my enthusiasm of today being the day I had to start walking again. We ate a terribly delicious dinner of delivery pizza and then I literally dragged myself from the couch to my bedroom to change. It took a good 20 minutes to find my motivation and mostly it was found in my super cute socks. Aren't they cute!!! Hey, it's the small things.

Because of all the rain on Monday, it was so muggy outside. Disgusting, really. And not to mention I pretty much whined the whole time. Lucky Vance. But with his help, I made it through. It was even probably the longest walk I've done. And left me looking a little less than pretty. I glistened, and not the good, sexy kind.

All I can say is I did it. Not an hour after I got out of the shower, washing the ugly off, it started to pour again. Hopefully the rain showers are over with for a while, all though it's worked wonders for our yard.

Now onto my next little obstacle, this guy...

He's been starring at my for quite some time. I don't like the scale for all the obvious reasons, but the main one being is I don't want to become focused or obsessed with a number. My goal here is to be healthy and happy, not 100lbs and a size 0. At the same time, I want to be able to watch and track my progress. I know I have even begun to change my eating habits, but I know adding this cardio into my life has to be having some sort of impact, right. I mean to go from NO physical activity to walking for 45 minutes or longer, 5 times a week has to be making a change. Not sure what I'll decide and how often I'll decide to do it.

What do ya'll think. Any suggestions on the scale issue?

Lazy Weekends

Our weekend can pretty much be summed up like this...

We had every intention of making our way back down to the lake this weekend. Friday we were just too tired to make the trip after work. We had dinner with some friends and then enjoyed a very mellow evening at home. Vance on the couch watching terrible tv and I in the bed intently reading. At around 11pm, Vance joins me in bed and at about 11:30am he shoots out of bed and runs to the bathroom. I barely have the energy to muster, what's wrong? Not only did our sewer line back up, but it has backed up so much so that our shower and bath tub were sitting rivers of SH!T. I'm not sure how we didn't notice or smell in until then, but soooooooooooooooooooo glad that he did, when he did, because we were VERY close to things being WAY more difficult then they already were. Vance worked his handy man magic and was able to get the standing shit sewage of out the shower and tub. We slept with one ear and eye opened for the rest of the night.

The next morning we called our local plumbing specialist, ABC Home and Commercial Services, and we were quickly put into queue. Needless to say we weren't all that willing to leave the house for the rest of the weekend, for a couple of reasons. 1.) A plumbers visit to your house on a Saturday is not the most inexpensive ticket items and 2.) The thought of coming back from the lake house to a flooded house was not at all appealing. So we stayed in town and laid low and it was actually quite relaxing. We had a little visit to the puppy park, I did a little birthday shopping (which I wasn't supposed to be doing) and we visited with a few friends we hadn't seen in a while. All in all, a unexpected GREAT weekend.

What DIDN'T happen, I hate to inform you, was my 5 days of walking. :( The holiday I think threw me a curve ball. My week went a little something like this.

Monday: Walked

Tuesday: Walked at lake house

Wednesday: OFF

Thursday: Walked with New Shoes :)

Friday: OFF

Saturday: Walked MILDLY at the puppy park

Sunday: Walked around the mall. ;)

So at least I didn't just lay horizontal, I didn't really suit up and give it my all either, though. :( On Thursday, the new shoes were giving me a little grief, which made me walk a little weird, which made me hurt a little more than usual. I'm a wuss, I know. So I think the lacked couple of days might have been a good thing. But I am shaking off last week's track record and jumping right back in this evening.

How was your weekend???

Hairrrrr Did

First things first, let's get the standard items out of the way. It may have hurt like the dickens to swing my arms back and forth for an hour, but by golly I swung 'em. Walk number four, check! GO, ME. One more to go and I will finish out the week successfully. The new shoes need to be worn in a little bit, but I looked pretty freakin' fly in them, and that's all that matters. Tomorrow we are headed back to the lake for a little more R and R and a lot my family time!

Now to the real subject at hand.

Anybody want to take a swing at what's wrong with this picture...

Here, let me help you...

Look at those ROOTS. Ignore the greasy/frizzy issue that is going on simultaneously, that one is actually fixable, on a good day. Next week I have a much anticipated hair appointment. I LOVE my hair appointments, for several reason. 1.) I am obsessed with the smell of hair color chemicals, 2.) My hairapist is like my therapist, so I always feel a bit of clarity when I leave and 3.) I look fly as sh!t when she's done. I am a bit of a hair whore. I can't seem to pick a length or a style or a color and stick to it, I want them and love them all. I grew and grew and grew my hair out for our wedding and simultaneously lightened it.

 About a month before the I do's, I decided I wanted to be a dark brown brunette for the wedding, good by hard work. 

Upon immediate return from the honeymoon, my hairapist freed me of my lovely lock burden and once again I was a length I was much more accustomed too.

Then we had a few phases.

We went red...

We went two-toned, my favorite...

And we have ended up here, with bangs!

So that has been my hair trends over the last two years. And guess what, now I am wanting to go lighter and go it back out. Here are the color choices I am leaning towards.

Via Pinterest

Found here

Found here

So what's your vote? I apologize for the lot of me post, but I just LOVE talking about hair!!!!!!

Not So Happy 5th!

Man, that 4th of July was bitter sweet, wasn't it!!!?? We headed straight to the lake house Tuesday after work and enjoyed every bit of the sun and water!!! So much so in fact that I now look like this...

This picture doesn't really do it justice, but I have a Rudolph thing going on for sure! This picture definitely shows you how the rest of my body is a blaze too. :(

I am an avid 50spf-er, so I am a little shocked at how red I got, but we did took full advantage of being outdoors all day long.

As we're getting to learn the town of Seguin, we decided to attend their annual 4th of July parade. Nothing like celebrating the 4th in small town USA.

Vance and Michael

The Bunch!

All in all we had a extremely good day in a half hiatus and I am totally bummed that I am back in my cubicle, while what seems like the rest of the world was smart enough to take today and tomorrow off.

In other news, my oh so supportive husband decided to gift me with a little motivation present, new shoes! 

We picked these bad boys up on Tuesday during lunch and I can't wait to try them out. Aren't they pretty?! Apparently, the 80's are trying to make a comeback, because every single show on the wall was a neon color.

 Tuesday night at the lake, we had a nice 2 mile stroll, more so than a walk, after dinner. And I'm hoping my burn isn't bad enough to keep from going tonight. Seriously, everything hurts and my bra is literally tearing a whole in my skin, at least that's how it feels. :(

That's what my life has been like for the past two days, how about yours???

So Naturally...

Yesterday I ventured to Target, one of my favorite places to visit, in search of two birthday cards and a new sports bra. The summer brings birthdays galore in my family and starting the last week of June we have one a week for a while. The sports bra is needed as I am in need of some extra support, enough said. While on my way to the sports bra table, I happened to notice there was a sale on swim suit pieces. Now, am I NEVER up for swimsuit shopping, but with the frequent Lake House visits we go on and a mini vacation sneaking up in us in August, I thought it may not be a bad idea to invest in another suit. I have one that I love and wear ALL the time, so the poor girl is close to being worn out. Let it be said, there is no more sure fire way to induce a bad mood/binge eating fest other than swim suit shopping. Now as a fair assessment, I had not yet eaten lunch, so big mistake there. But as soon as I decided on a suit that made me the least Grendel looking, I flew to the check out and RAN to McDonald's to console my breaking heart. So naturally, this is what ended up going down at my desk around 1:00pm. :(

I ate my burger and sipped on my sweet tea, but about 15 fries in I had this overwhelming since of disgust, threw everything into the bag and threw it away and was left with my swimsuit and disappointment.

I know that right now I am focusing on the exercise portion, that my goal right now is to continue to walk 5 times a week. But I don't want that to give me permission to stuff my mouth with the world's most terrible foods, which I feel is what I've been doing. I just know that if I try to tackle too many things at one time, I will be setting myself up for failure.

So last night, my Mom, Dad, Aunt and sister came over for a birthday dinner. And once bellies were full, dishes washed and leftovers packed, I laced up my tennis shoes and hit the pavement for a late night 45 minute walk. I felt a little better having done something good, after my something bad.

This morning I was back to feeling better about myself and actually excited about my new swim suit purchase. No one ever said this little journey was going to be easy or speedy for that matter. And sometimes I catch myself envious of those other weight loss bloggers who set out to lose weight and then just do it. Like BAM, today it hit me and I am putting down everything that is bad for me and working out everyday and yes, some days  are hard, but I'm superwoman and that's that. Why can't I be those girls? Why is this soooooooo difficult for me? Why is it so hard to make this lifestyle change?

I don't really have the answers to those questions, other than I can only be me and I can only do this my way. And I really need to just focus on the good and know that eventually if I can continue the progress and the positive attitude that it can ONLY point me in the right direction. And as far as all those other super weight loss bloggers, I am going to keep them in my thoughts as THIS WILL ONE DAY BE ME!